UPDATE UPDATE: Mrs. G. is leaving June 11th, 2012

Below are the list of you who have emailed or left comments. If I have missed you or put you in the wrong spot, leave a comment and I will fix it. It was a mistake, nothing personal. For anyone who is interested in getting together who hasn't responded, now is the time to speak up. Mr. G. Mrs. G. is going to  finalize her route by the end of next week. Some fabulous news is that she has plenty of places to lay her head. This is all so exciting!

Money update: Mrs. G. is putting up $400 of her own money to put toward rental car and gas. Unless something incredible happens, like her street prostitution business takes off, that's all she can afford. Several generous derfs have contributed $425. This is a great start. If Mrs. G. isn't able to raise the necessary funds, we'll try it again next year, but she wants you to know if that is the case, she will refund your money immediately. One of the great things about  Paypal is how easy they make it to return money to senders.



Keetha/ (Willing to drive to Memphis or Jackson)





Darla/ Berkeley

Other Kay/ Modesto

Aunt Snow/ Los Angeles

Cardinal/Santa Barbara

Jen/San Diego

Aaryn/San Diego

Debbie in AZ (willing to drive to S. California)

Bright-Side Susan/Pleasanton

Sara/Granite Bay/Sacramento

cardinal/Santa Barbara

Susan/San Diego


Smalltown Me/Santa Barbara

MS Teacher/N. California

Betsy/San Jose

Elizabeth/Los Angeles


Susan B/Santa Barbara




Nora (Maybe)



Little Miss Sunshine/(Willing to drive to Atlanta)

Lynne/SW Florida (Willing to drive to Atlanta)

Marie/Sarasota (Can maybe drive to Atlanta)



Janet (Maybe willing to drive to Atlanta)


Carolyn/Northern Kentucky (Across river from Cincinatti)











Lisa L/Toledo (willing to drive to Detroit)

Katie (Cincinnati)

Debra B.





Diane Carol/Grand Rapids




Kellyg/Grand Rapids

Jessie B/(willing to drive to Kansas City)

Albug/(lives in Indiana but willing to drive to MI or Chicago)

Beth G/Ann Arbor



Julie M./Madison


Julie B./Madison

Tonya (Close to Minneapolis)

Green Girl/NE Wisconsin

Christy Lee/Madison






Lisa/Des Moines


Jenny/Iowa City






Erin (Willing to drive to Boston)

Mainly Alaskan

Naomi B (Willing to drive to Boston)


North Carolina


Susan, Cary

Jayme L./Statesville








Minnesota Matron Mary/ Minneapolis (Willing to drive to Madison)

Kristin/St. Paul

N and Em's mom/(Lives in St. Louis, but willing to drive to Minneapolis)

TLB/Minneapolis/St. Paul

Nina/Central Minnesota









Britta/ Seattle

Melinda/Seattle (wants to be determined)

Nora/Seattle (wants to ride to be determined)




Gina/Port Townsend

D. Anderson/Sequim

kabbage and love bug/Vancouver

Gina (Again)/Olympia

Cindy/Walla Walla


AngAK/(Lives in Alaska, might be able to make it to Seattle)

Nancy G/Gig Harbor



Sew Sew/Lewiston ( Possibly Spokane or Minneapolis)



Buddy's Mom

The Other Laura/San Antonio (Willing to travel Texas)



Salty Mama/Central TX


Laurie/San Antonio








Debbie J./Rockville


New York


Galena/Niagra Falls

Caro/ (Maybe can drive to Niagra Falls)



Becky/Upstate NY



Christine/Upstate NY

Barb/Northport (Long Island)


New Jersey

Leslie Jane/Central NJ

Amy G./North NJ

Amy/North, Central NJ



Lisa/SE Kansas (willing to drive to Kansas City)

Martha Mc/Prairie Village (willing to drive to Kansas City)

Heather W/Kansas City

Jill P/Kansas City



Suburban Correspondent

Jenn B./Charlottesville



Annie/Near Charlottesville



Liz P./Eugene



Sungmanitu and K./Portland

Lisa M./Eugene



A Different Jessie/Philly (Willing to drive to NJ)






Monica/(Might be able to drive to CO)

Becky/N. Colorado


TC/Denver (maybe)




Cha Cha/Kansas City

Kelley/Kansas City

Jan/Kansas City area



Jen H./South Sioux City





Carol/Quad Cities (Willing to drive to Des Moines or Chicago)



Stephanie/West Jordan



Alesia/(Willing to travel to Boston)



Naomi/New Orleans



Dottales/ ( willing to travel to Niagara Falls, NY, NJ and parts of PA)



Who is Mrs. G. forgetting? It's time for you lurkers to step forward!


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Reader Comments (110)

Oops, forgot to post before! I'm in San Diego, and we have a guest bed if you need it!

March 23, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSusan:)

I mean this respectfully but maybe you should leave these kinds of escursions to the A-listers who don't have to hold out their hand so far. Times are too hard right now to ask readers for $$. Just have a Washington party and call it a day.

I'm going to have to second regular reader anon tonight's thoughts. Your sights might be set a little too high here, which is one of the things I love about you but I still have major researvations this is a good idea.

March 23, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAnother Reader

Susan, I added you.

Regular and another reader, thank you for your concern but you never know unless you try. What ever happens happens. I hope to prove you wrong just so you might be willing to take more risks yourselves!

March 23, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMrs. G.

Hey, you were supposed to read my mind after the other post and add me! Space here for you to sleep! I'm in Charlotte, NC.

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCaren

Don't forget me!! Becky in NY!! I'm willing to travel if needed!!

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBecky in Uptate NY

Hey, don't forget me! I know - totally my own fault. I'm in Virginia, near Charlottesville. Having an empty nest, I've got spare beds.

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered Commenter~annie

Vermont! Come to Vermont!

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAlesia

I'm in! Saint Paul, Minnesota:)

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKristen

I live in Europe so I am not concerned with your planning (actually, Madison is tempting...). I think it is a good idea to try it. I would be glad to donate, any idea what budget you need?
I think this blog is a wonderful support group and asking for donations is not a big deal. Nobody is required to donate, and we are probably not all struggling on the money side. I come here regularly, it is sometimes very encouraging and inspiring. Good job Mrs. G and all inhabitants of Derwad Manor.

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterVéronique

I am back from a decadent-yet-low-cost vacation and am ready to add my name to the Michigan list...Mary, in metro Detroit, but willing to travel. We also have a guest room, and I can afford to PayPal some cash to you, because my hubs works his tail off, and he got a bonus! Yay!

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterunmitigated me

A note on the donation flow. There are many of us that may need more time to know what amount we can donate, so trust that more will come in than on the first day or two. I know for my part, I will be trickling in a little here and a little there. I intended to keep this up through July, so I could more likely make a pledge amount right now, but fulfill that pledge over a couple of months. I understand that isn't very reassuring during the planning stage, but I think many Derfs are considering donations under similar circumstances.
Kudos on the planning and risk and trust. This will be epic.

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered Commentermolly

Me! Me! Don't forget me! I'm in Rocklin, CA, suburb of Sacramento. Please add me to your list.

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterElaine

I agre with Molly - more $ may be coming. At least that's what I planned. And if you want to add my city, it's Statesville, NC.

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJayme L

Man, how did I forget this! I am in northern colorado, about 60 north of Denver, and am committing to put you up in a slightly more than adequate guest room. Or I will drive to Denver for a meet-up. Or I can host a meet-up here. Whatever works.

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterbecky

Yo! Mrs. G! I'm going to quote Duckie from Pretty in Pink and ask "DO I OFFEND???" Northeast Wisconsin here--willing to give you room and board or drive to meet you wherever you land in the Midwest Territory!!!

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterGreen Girl in Wisconsin

So exciting! I forgot to post in the other thread. I am in WA, up in Port Townsend. Sign me up for the post trip party! And if you want a trial run, you are more than welcome to drive up to PT and spend the night on our couch. I don't have any cats, just a 3 year old who thinks she is a cat. Also included is a chef husband and a smartypants redheaded 5 year old. Good times!

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered Commentergina

Such a great idea Mrs. G! I am in Sequim and will drive to Seattle for the finale. I will also contribute $ to the cause since I know I will more than get my money's worth reading about your adventures!

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterD. Anderson

@regular and another reader: You have a point. But consider that we are scattered across the country - some of us way out on the East Coast. I don't think I could manage a trip out west, but I'll probably be able to scrape together a little something to help bring Mrs. G here. Win-win if it happens!

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered Commenter~annie

Mrs G. could you hook me up with Molly in Oklahoma? Give her my email if you can. We might be able to hook up and car pool up to KC depending on where she's at if that's where you end up going.

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterLisaWinks

I forgot to post!. I'm near Santa Barbara, have a bed, and I can donate after the 1st.

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSmalltown Me

I think I've got everyone in so far! As far as donations go, I am not worried (unlike others who probably wouldn't clap to keep Tinkerbell alive) but I am trying to be hyper-transparent because I know so much negative shit has gone down in the name of "fundraising" on the internet. Also, I want to make it clear (because "extra" money isn't easy for all of us to come by) that if this doesn't pan out, contributions will be returned immediately.

Also, I've been in positions in several points in my life where a donation except to the grocery store conservancy was out of the question. I get it. Don't sweat it...just show up at a gathering and have a blast, you deserve it!

My chief navigator and money man, Mr. G, thinks, based on inquiries of renting a car for four weeks and current gas prices, $2500-$3000 is a good goal. We are also discussing cutting costs by taking one of our cars (he thinks it would be fine) but I am pretty married to the idea of a car rental place bringing me a new car should I break down along the way rather than potentially sitting around waiting for a Ford Focus part to come in. Also, I would really like to have a GPS to rely on and Onstar in case of emergency.

This is going to happen because it's been a long time coming and it's all about good. Doubters, just be quiet.

March 24, 2012 | Registered CommenterMrs. G.

Attagirl, Mrs. G!! You never know unless you try. Come on, Derfwads! Can we get this tour off the ground? YES, WE CAN!!!

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered Commentersw

I'm only a few hours from you, but you are welcome to the futon, a meal, coffee, or a chance to play with this girl: if you are missing Chewy. I'm in Vancouver, WA, just outside of Portland, OR.

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterkabbage

I'm in Olympia. Kick-off... after party... waving from the Sleeter-Kinney bridge as the rented Derfmobile drives down I-5... Whatever you need... I'm there!

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterGina

I would love to help with some of the cost & would love to meet you! I'm in NorCal, between Sacramento & San Francisco. I don't have a bed to spare, but maybe I can meet up with you with other folks in this area.

Personally, I think it is awesome that you are trying this!

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterms_teacher

Amy - Mechanicsville, Iowa

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAmy

I am moving from NV to Overland Park (Kansas City area) in a month. If the timing works, I would love to join up!

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJan (lurker)

Oh, I'm a quite occasional lurker, but had to say what a great idea. I love this blog; sometimes I read and laugh, sometimes cry, sometimes both. I share it with others and we howl at some of the entries. More of the country needs to know you - go for it! I wish I could donate, but if you do think to make it down to the northernmost outpost of the Caribbean - New Orleans - I'll give you a place to stay. The futon's in a loft with skylights, a bit hot in the summer (really, a bit? who am I fooling?) but we do have a/c and a nice little courtyard as do our neighbors who are all pretty wonderful (you could even meet Miss Grace, who was a "fancy girl" in her youth, though "God saved me 'fore I got too old". She's 90.) Maybe on your way to or from Texas. Oh yeah, friends on trips have rented Priuses, loved the gas mileage and the car is very roomy. C'mon down, maybe we'll catch a second line.

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered Commenternaomi

I can also go to North Carolina, Virginia, and Cincinnati if necessary. :) And I"m planning to send you something after the first because that's how we do it here.

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJanet

I can't imagine why anyone would expect you to pay the entire cost of a trip around the country. The fact that you're willing to give up a month of your time, put yourself at risk driving around the country, and spend $400 is incredibly generous of you. From a purely economic perspective, this is the cheapest way of meeting your readers. If you held a Washington event, most of the people on your list would have to fly to the state. Given the high cost of air-fare, the $3,000 you plan on spending would cover approximately 10 tickets. Not only that, but it would shift the economic burden to a few readers who are able to afford a ticket -- not to mention travel time, food, and lodging. In my opinion, the benefit I will receive from meeting you will far exceed my donation to the cause. And, even if I don't meet you, the pleasure I receive from participating in the Derf Community and knowing that others are meeting you is worth it.

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBuddy's Mom

I'm in north central NJ...can travel to NY or PA...and there is a spare bed and bath here for you if you need it.

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterLeslie Jane

I'm late! I live in Oswego NY, sorta near Syracuse. I have a guest room always available for you. (Becky, where in upsate? Upstate NY is very, very big...) (I'm about 2 hours from Gary and willing to drive to Ithaca.)

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterpatricia

..."unlike others who probably wouldn't clap to keep Tinkerbell alive." This line made me laugh so hard -- thanks for that! :)

Also, I will be contributing, just need to wait til after the 1st of the month.

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBritta

Becky from upstate NY is around whitney Point, just down the street from Ithaca and Oswego. That is 3 of us here. Niagara is 3 hours west, marms is 3 hours east. Anyway, Missus G, I have NO CASH, none, but would be happy to make several Derf teapots, mugs, whatever, featuring a cat, for example, or something, and "Derf" or "Derfwad Manor" or whatever written on there, and donate the entire proceeds to your trip (well, aside from the shipping cost). That way I give something I can easily make and give, you have cash, the payer has cool custom made Derf sh!t :) email me girl....

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered Commentergary rith

I too will be on the slightly-delayed donation list but I am so thrilled this is happening; a national road-trip sounds heavenly. I had mentioned in a previous post that I might be able to carpool but that was under the misguided belief (no seriously, how much wine had I had that night?) that you would be doing day-trip jaunts from home and back. :)

Still, I'm in for the post-trip Washington party (because Kirkland isn't exactly far enough to be an exciting couch offer!) and hope that there will be video diaries or photo slideshows or links to others' blogs with updates about your visits as we go!

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterteacakes

Don't let the nay-sayers and haters give you pause. I see a book coming out of this trip, Mrs G. You will sell millions of copies and finally be able to care of Mr G in the way he deserves. And meet fabulous people along the way. And allow fabulous people in the same area to meet.

It's brilliant. Happily contributing.

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered Commentercheryl

Mrs. G - thrilled beyond words! I'was thinking that depending on the dates, maybe the Atlanta and NC Derfs might think about a combined event? Of course, I am up for anything and am recruiting a couple of sisters and a friend or two -- only those that would fit in. (As a few of my sisters said when I shared the "Bigger Love" post -- "What a great idea..what's not to love?") Anyway - I'm with Molly and a few others and will hit paypal more than once. Also, don't forget that should you need a place to lay your head that is between Derf Meet ups, I am happy to give you Marriott or Starwood points for $0 accomodation. Lastly - as the youngest of 7 children, Gary Rith, will you please be my little brother?

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered Commentermartha

If Walla Walla, WA turns out to be a place you would like to rest your weary head -- we can definitely deliver. The timing is hard for me (our daughter is graciously making me a grandmother in early July) to commit to an event, but we can contribute $ and seriously if this is a good spot to stop for the night we're in.

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCindy in Walla Walla

Ok. Putting on my big girl pants now. I wasn't going to add my name to the list because 1.) I wasn't sure if I would be able to get to one of your stops. 2.) I am sooo not good at these large gatherings of people I don't know. But! I really, really want to be a part of this.

So...... I am in Grand Rapids, MI also. If you make a stop in Chicago or the Detroit/Ann Arbor area, I will do my very, very best to try to get to you. And I will do my very, very best to actually talk to the other Derfs and say hi to you. (Although it would be so, so easy for me, I don't know if a gathering in Grand Rapids would make sense -- pull from Chicago and the rest of MI. Guess that's why we should leave those details to you).

And like others, I will send a donation to you in a few days.

Ok taking a deep breath and hitting post.

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterkellyg

kellyg- way to go, girl!

Echoing upthread comments that I am happy to donate again. I would definitely have flown to a single gathering; donating to get Mrs. G. closer to me is a bargain. I don't understand the negativity; no one is forcing me to chip in. I'm doing it at a level that works for me. Feel free to do the same, or not. Why rain on the parade?

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered Commentercardinal

I'm about 2 hours north of Boston. It will depend on what date you'll be out this way as to whether or not I can make it. I've just activated a PayPal account so I can help you get out here. Fingers crossed it will work out!

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterNaomi B.

I am in Lincoln, Nebraska and we have a spare bed - and food! Also willing to travel a ways. Will read how to donate - not up on that yet. You can do it with our help!

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterLiz

Gary I mapped from my town to yours, and it's only 5.5 hours to drive to where you are! Considering we routinely do a 23 hour road trip (without any stops!) this sounds like a piece of cake. AND I mentioned to the hubby how much I'd love a road trip to NY this summer and he didn't look at me like I'm crazy. Of course he's milking it, demanding all sorts of back tickling, massages and desserts in return. But for the chance to meet up with fellow Derfs, I'm happy to comply.

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCaro

I should mention, looking back: a) I will sure as hell be anybody's little brother :) I tend to add imaginary cousins, as some of you know, at the drop of a hat (click my name below to my blob and email or whatever) and b) depending on Mrs G's convenience, i would def. go to Oswego or over to Marm's in Hudson Valley or even over to Ontario and Niagara where ya'lls are if that is easier for her route

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered Commentergary rith

Interested in joining everyone. Located in Quad Cities, Illinois so Des Moines or Chicago easily done.

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCarol Triebel

I posted but don't see my name. DC area = Rockville, MD.

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterDebbie J

I missed the other post. I am near San Jose and can drive to San Francisco, Sacramento, Modesto, etc. I will try to donate something soon. Hope the trip works out!

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBetsy

For some reason, I can't get to you via email. I never mentioned that I am in Grayling, MI, which is a lovely up-north kind of small town with a great state forest/park. We are happy to offer the extra bedroom/bath, but it most likely won't make sense for you to come this far north. My daughter in Grand Rapids will be joining me, and I see that several other Derfs live there. That may make a good meeting area, only outside GR, not in a busy location. This is so exciting! I'll be so happy to see it work out for all of us who love this community you have assembled here.

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCarolyn

Jan(lurker), I live in Overland Park, it's a great part of the city! If you need any info on anything, please let me know!

March 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKelley

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